Friday, October 16, 2009

I am in a serious realtionship with Facebook

Well, here is to posting two days in a row. Originally, I thought I would give a little gap in between my posts but I couldn't help but feel the urge to get back to  my computer and write about dear old Facebook. Sitting in LA traffic for nearly and hour and a half helped, as my mind battled back and forth about the pros and cons of Facebook. More specifically the beast that it has become, and the fact that most days I feel like it is a bad boyfriend whom I love to hate.

Love is the keyword here, because it is easy to hate Facebook, but lets face it, we all love it to a certain extent. If you disagree then I assume you don't have a Facebook account anymore. Some days I love it. Some days I hate it. Sometimes I love how it makes me laugh, and others I hate that it makes me feel so darn unaccomplished, or behind. But, I have definitely come to the conclusion that whether I like it or not, I am in fact, in a serious relationship with Facebook.

It all started one College Sophomore morning in the basement of a sorority house. Facebook asked me out on a date, and I obliged, very willingly. It was great at first. Learning everything about it, telling it all about myself, sharing pictures, and life stories. Then, Facebook started to introduce me to other people. I learned so much about friends and classmates because Facebook had all of the secrets! It gave me a lot of information that my peers didn't necessarily disclose on a regular basis. It was great.  The best part about it was that I only had to show the best side of myself. No fat arm angles on Facebook! No morning breath, or pimpled face, or teary eyes. No, no, no, just pure glory people! It was the best relationship ever.

Facebook has changed a lot on me through the years, and every time I log into my account and see that it has out done itself once again, I curse because I have to learn something new. But isn't that what a great relationship does? I guess I changed a lot on Facebook as well. You know, my weight fluctuated a little, my hair was short, then long, then short again. Friends have come and gone, many have stayed the same, and I have even moved a few times. So really Facebook and I have been through a lot together.

But, believe it or not, we have broken up several times. I have deactivated my account out of jealously, anger, and disgust, only to find that Facebook never leaves. It is always there, storing all of my precious information. And then,  magically everything goes back to normal when you sign back in. Its as if the break up never happened. Then I go on a little confused, and feeling a little guilty because I treated it so bad, and that once again I have given into this relationship. Will Facebook ever go away, or am I going to have to really kick it out of my life for good?

Someone very precious in my life ( my wonderful boyfriend) brought to my attention a few weeks ago that maybe my relationship with Facebook really needed to take a break for awhile. You see, with this day and  age of constant status updates, the phrase "the grass is always greener on the other side" became a very big reality. Don't get me wrong, I love status updates. I hate to admit that I love knowing exactly what is going on in everyone's lives and most of the time peoples updates make me laugh, or put a smile on my face. But, what I didn't realize is that I was forgetting to appreciate and be thankful for what I had in my life, where I was, where I came from, and where I was going. It's way to easy to do this. Someone gets to go to a football game you are dying to be at, another just went on a shopping spree and you have no clothes, or maybe its that family or friends are all getting together and you are missing out. Whatever it may be, I was beginning to wish that I had everything that everyone else had, not because I truly wanted it, but because on Facebook everything seems so glorious. I don't know what it is about those darn status updates, but they really can give life a face lift sometimes.

So...after a two day hiatus from the world of Facebook, I was back at it. Addiction? Maybe....probably. Boredom? Most certainly. Nosiness? A little.  I must say that with the help of my oh so cute significant other, I am dealing with my Facebook addiction. I try to keep it at a minimum, but most importantly I am viewing Facebook in a different light. So here is a little letter to Facebook from me:

Dear Facebook,
I love you, but I have to think of our relationship a little differently these days. You have just gotten too powerful for me to place any or all of my trust in. I will not be taking anything that is written within your walls for certain, because  deep down I know that the only things that are certain in life are true friends and family. Thank you for keeping me up to date on all of my friends lives, and making me laugh in the meantime. But, please, don't bother me unless I bother you. I am turning off all of my notifications and I hope you will understand. I wish you the best of the luck in the future, but please don't replace true friendships for Facebook friendships anytime soon. That would be a sad day. Don't worry, I won't stay too far. I am grateful that you let me share my writing with my friends, and pictures with my family, but for now I will be thinking of you as the Facebook I knew four years ago, when you were young and innocent. So long.

Dulce

In conclusion, I really think that in some way we are all in a relationship with Facebook, although the degrees of seriousness vary. I am no less guilty than anyone else out there. I am just learning that day by day I have to wean myself off of this relationship and maybe someday I will break free. Or will I? We'll see. For now, I have learned a valuable lesson, and that is to just be happy with who I am no matter what is going on in the rest of the world. Because, really, all that matters is happiness that comes from the inside not from a social networking giant.

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